Self-care as a parent
Self-care seems to be a trending topic at the moment - among coaches as well as among parents. I am still learning a lot on self-care and discovering many new things as I go along. As parents, I feel that self-care is so important - as they say on the airplane, it’s about putting on your own oxygen mask before attending to your child. If we don’t take care of ourselves, how can we take care of the tiny humans that depend on us every day (and let’s face it, just suck all the energy out of us most of the time)?
I do believe though that self-care is very personal and your needs can vary from day to day. What works for me, might not work at all for you. It also depends on your personal situation. While juggling life with a baby and a toddler, I‘ve tried to take those 5 minute breaks that everyone is talking about. 5 minutes to breathe, 5 minutes to meditate, 5 minutes to stretch… while it probably does have some positive effect, for me in that difficult phase, it didn‘t seem much of a self-care, because it didn‘t really help me recharge my energy. And while I know that really recharging my energy takes a lot of time and effort, I have found a few things that help me get through the days and weeks a little bit less stressed and a tiny bit more patient at the moment:
Whenever I can, I try to take time first thing in the morning to meditate and journal. With kids, these mornings are rare (even more so with a baby that needs to be breastfed), but every time it is possible, I realise what a luxury it is to set up a morning routine and how it helps me feel energetic when starting my day. I‘ve discovered journaling about a year and a half ago, and even when I cannot sit down to write in the morning, I do try to take a couple of minutes during the day to jot down some thoughts. The self-reflection and self-discovery has helped me get through the challenges of the past year as well as a second pregnancy with a toddler by my side.
I noticed the benefits of a daily yoga practice during the first lockdown back in 2020, when I started doing the 30 days of yoga videos by Adriene on Youtube. While 30 days of yoga still seem like a challenge 3 months postpartum, I do enjoy a gentle yoga session or a quick stretch on the mat. It does help me recharge a little bit after a long day. With two kids, I rarely find the time to do any yoga during the day anymore, and in the evenings, I am usually quite tired, so at the moment, I‘m focusing on gentle evening practises and yin yoga.
If you are looking to boost your energy a little bit during the day, yoga nidra might be worth a try. I often struggle to nap when the baby naps, because his nap times are so unpredictable and it often feels that I just have the time to lay down and close my eyes before he wakes again. Yoga nidra is a yogic sleep and helps your body feel rested after only a short period of time.
Last year, I started feeling frustrated about the amount of time I spend scrolling around aimlessly on social media. So I downloaded an e-reader app and instead of being on my phone, I would read while sitting in my toddler‘s room while he fell asleep. I had forgotten how much I enjoyed reading. I spent a lot of time in libraries with my mother during my childhood, picking new books to read, and I‘d even get up earlier on school days to read for half an hour before getting out of bed! I‘ve since started to read regularly again, though this year with two kids around, it has definitely been harder. And my list of books to read keeps growing faster than I can read… I have recently discovered audio books, which might be a bit more adapted to life with a baby.
One thing that always makes me feel better is going for a walk on a sunny day. I particularly enjoy walking by the sea, which is ironic given that I grew up in a landlocked country and chose to move to another one. At least, there are many lakes here in Switzerland with breathtaking views. But even a quick walk around the neighbourhood can help me recharge a little bit of energy after a long day.
As I mentioned earlier, these are some self-care ideas that work for you, but that doesn‘t mean that they work for everyone. If you‘d like to explore what would fit your self-care routine, get in touch with me and we can have a chat during a first free coaching session!